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The Good News about Bad Behavior with Katherine Reynolds Lewis

Special guest: Katherine Reynolds Lewis.
There is a new and surprising problem that has quietly but perhaps not unnotably come to fruition during more recent years—our children are out of control in comparison to previous generations. It’s not your imagination. A recent study of first-graders found that they could sit still for no more than three minutes—which is actually only a quarter of the time that their peers could in 1948. Government statistics show that half of all children will develop a mood or behavioral disorder or a substance addiction by age 18. What the heck is going on? I receive questions through Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and email all asking about what parents, teachers and coaches can do to get children to behave better. The old methods of rewards and punishments—star charts and time outs are not working. Are your ears perking up? We’ve all seen it and you are not alone.

My next guest has some good news about bad behavior—and some great tips and scripts to help us better understand our children and how to help our children learn to self-regulate.

Katherine Reynolds Lewis is an award-winning journalist and author of The Good News About Bad Behavior: Why Kids Are Less Disciplined Than Ever – And What to Do About It. Her work has appeared in the Atlantic, Fortune, Money, Mother Jones, The New York Times, Parade, Slate, USA Today’s magazine group, the Washington Post Magazine and Working Mother. She’s an EWA Education Reporting Fellow and Logan Nonfiction Fellow at the Carey Institute for Global Good. Residencies include the Virginia Center for the Creative Arts and Ragdale. Previously, Katherine was a national correspondent for Newhouse and Bloomberg News, covering everything from financial and media policy to the White House. She holds a BA in physics from Harvard University and is a certified parent educator with the Parent Encouragement Program (PEP) in Kensington, Md. She and her husband Brian are the proud parents of three children, 25, 14 and 12 years old.

How to Talk to Kids about Grit and Passion with Jodi Bondi Norgaard

Special guest: Jodi Bondi Norgaard.
How do we keep going, hammering away at our dreams, when we find ourselves faced with disappointment, frustration, failure and a big fat NO from those who can help make these dreams happen? It comes down to perseverance. Persistence. Determination and grit. We keep on going because there is a fire in us that tells us we must try yet another time. How does this play out in real life? Just recently, one of my very best friends posted a video of her daughter playing a song on the piano. A year ago, she had committed to learning “Piano Man” by Billy Joel—a very challenging goal for the then, 9-year-old. But she was adamant about doing it—and she persevered. She hit bumps in the road, valleys on tough days, fumbling fingers and wrong notes. But she kept going. Today, she debuted the song—and it was delightful. A full year of dedication to a goal from a child—that’s a huge part of her life. But she will always know that when she sticks to something—when she sets a goal and perseveres—she can make what seems monumentally challenging—an achieved reality.

Today we are going to talk to someone who also made her goal a reality despite facing frustration, failure and disapproval. She, too, persevered—and so we will devote today’s special podcast to how she reached down deep to keep going and what words of advice she has for our children who must learn to do this too, in their own way. How do we help kids find their passion? And how do we help them go after it when they find it—despite the fact that success doesn’t happen in a straight line?

Jodi Bondi Norgaard is the creator of the award-winning Go! Go! Sports Girls line of dolls and books for girls encouraging healthy and active play over fashion and body image. Jodi is a consultant, activist, and keynote speaker, inspiring and empowering women and girls throughout the world.
 
She has been featured on national media including The Today Show, Forbes, and Upworthy. In 2016, Jodi was invited by the Obama-era White House to participate in conferences on breaking down gender stereotypes in media and toys. The Go! Go! Sports Girls brand was recently acquired by Jazz-wears (Jazwares), an established cutting-edge toy company.

How to Use Positive Discipline to Stop Power Struggles and Raise Empowered Capable Kids with Jane Nelsen

Special guest: Dr. Jane Nelsen.
Children are always learning- and yes, they also make a lot of mistakes. Whether they are fighting with their siblings, tantruming about bedtime, missing the bus, forgetting their homework or talking back to you, it seems like there is a constant need for correction, apologies and do-overs. At the same time, there are all kinds of parents and teachers out there who witness such mistakes—from people who watch children act out or mess up and punish them or deliver punitive consequences immediately—to those who are incredibly permissive—who see children do something undesired and simply turn the other cheek and say; “kids will be kids.” Many parents and educators fall somewhere in between or vacillate between the two extremes of punitive and permissive.

Of course, most parents and teachers are just trying to figure out how to raise children who are kind, responsible, cooperative and self-disciplined. But what if I told you that there are many parenting and teaching skills that we can talk about right now that are non-punitive and not permissive—but would help children learn self-discipline, responsibility, and problem-solving skills—helping them to grow up into adults who can use these skills throughout their lives? Whether you are trying to get the kids to school on time, get everyone to agree on a movie for movie night or get from place to place without someone yelling or kicking or needling someone else in the car, we all deal with power struggles and frustration. Today, we’ve got positive discipline expert, Jane Nelsen on the show—and she’s going to help us learn how to be both kind and firm, connect with our children, give them a sense of belonging and significance—while helping them choose right from wrong.

Dr. Jane Nelsen is the mother of 7, grandmother of 22, and great grandmother of 13. She is also the author and co-author of many best-selling Positive Discipline books including Positive Discipline: The Classic Guide to Helping Children Develop Self-Discipline, Responsibility, Cooperation and Problem-Solving Skills and Positive Discipline Parenting Tools. An internationally known speaker and parenting expert, Jane is a California licensed marriage, family and child therapist, and received her doctorate in Educational Psychology from the University of San Francisco.