How to Talk to Kids about Surviving and Thriving with Autism with Leland Vittert

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Mini Synopsis:

What happens when a child grows up misunderstood, labeled, or underestimated? In this powerful episode of How to Talk to Kids About Anything, Dr. Robyn Silverman sits down with journalist and author Leland Vittert to explore his remarkable journey growing up with undiagnosed autism — and the relentless love, structure, and persistence that helped him thrive. Together, they unpack lessons of resilience, intentional parenting, and how unwavering belief from one adult can change the trajectory of a child’s life.

INTRODUCTION:

So many parents worry about what the future will hold for their children—especially when their child struggles socially, feels misunderstood, or faces labels that can limit their potential. How do we guide and support our kids when the world doesn’t bend easily to meet their needs? Today on How to Talk to Kids About Anything, we’ll explore the powerful impact of persistence, love, and intentional parenting in helping children rise above challenges. We’ll discuss lessons of resilience, the parent–child bond, and how families can work together to equip kids with the skills and confidence they need to thrive.

Bio:

Leland Vittert is the host of On Balance with Leland Vittert and serves as NewsNation’s Chief Washington Anchor, where he covers national affairs and delivers primetime reports. A veteran journalist, he has spent years reporting from some of the world’s most pivotal events and locations—from the Middle East as a foreign correspondent to the political heart of Washington, D.C. Beyond his distinguished career in journalism, Leland is now sharing his deeply personal journey in his forthcoming book, Born Lucky: A Dedicated Father, A Grateful Son, and My Journey with Autism, releasing September 30, 2025 with Harper Horizon. In it, he reflects on the challenges he faced growing up, the relentless love and guidance of his father, and his transformation into the journalist and person he is today.

Important Messages:

Born Lucky — Against All Odds – Leland Vittert
“The doctor delivered me via C-section and when I came out, everyone gasped. The cord had been tied in a knot and wrapped around my neck. Had I been born naturally, I would’ve died or had severe cerebral palsy. The doctor crossed out ‘Leland’ on the hospital board and wrote, ‘Call him Lucky.’ From that point forward, I was known as Lucky Vittert. It framed my entire existence — I was both incredibly lucky to be alive and already fighting against the odds.”
Labels Can Limit — or Liberate – Leland Vittert
“It was very important to my parents that I not be defined by a diagnosis. My dad didn’t want me to feel limited, and he didn’t want others to write me off. But there was another reason — he didn’t want accommodations that would reshape the world around me. He believed that if the world adapted to me, I wouldn’t learn how to adapt to the world. As hard as it was, that mindset prepared me for real life.”
Facing Adversity — With Relentless Support – Leland Vittert
“My parents didn’t shield me from adversity — they made me face it. But they didn’t make me face it alone. Every single day, I would walk home from school and my dad would be standing at the bottom of the driveway. He’d hug me and listen to me unload all the frustrations from the day. What I didn’t know until much later was that after I went to bed, he would sit downstairs alone and cry himself to sleep. He absorbed all my pain so I could keep trying.”
Loneliness and the Power of One Friend – Dr. Robyn & Leland
“You talk about your father being your only friend for a long time,” Dr. Robyn reflects. “For parents who are worried their child doesn’t have friends, do you have a message of hope?” Leland responds, “Hope was everything. My parents felt hopeless at times too. But what I learned is that one person’s unwavering belief can be enough. My dad’s friendship sustained me until I could build confidence and connection elsewhere.”
Intelligence Isn’t Always Measurable – Leland Vittert
“When I was tested in the early 80s, autism wasn’t well understood unless it was visibly obvious. They gave me an IQ test and it came back with a 70-point spread — mentally retarded on one side and genius on the other. They said they’d never seen anything like it. Most professionals would’ve prescribed intervention, treatment, therapy. My dad said, ‘Nope.’ He asked if there was anything he could do. They said, ‘Generally, no.’ But he proved them wrong.”
No Excuses — Just Love and High Standards – Leland Vittert
“My dad was incredibly loving and patient — but there were no excuses. There was no ‘because of autism’ or ‘because of a label, I can’t.’ The standard was the standard. If I had deficits, we addressed them. But I was never allowed to hide behind them. He taught me that the world wouldn’t lower the bar for me, so I needed to rise to it.”
The World Won’t Adapt — So We Must – Leland Vittert
“My dad’s whole philosophy was that the world wasn’t going to bend to make things easier for me. He’d say, ‘Life isn’t fair — but that doesn’t give you permission to quit.’ He didn’t take away challenges, he equipped me to meet them. That mindset—adapt yourself rather than waiting for the world to adapt—became the foundation for everything I did later in life.”
Persistence Over Perfection – Leland Vittert
“I wasn’t the smartest, I wasn’t the fastest, I wasn’t the most coordinated — but I could outwork almost anyone. That was my superpower. My dad didn’t care if I was the best, he cared if I kept showing up. He used to say, ‘The world is full of talented quitters — be the one who stays in the fight.’ That stayed with me through everything.”
Confidence Comes from Competence – Leland Vittert
“My father didn’t build my confidence by telling me I was amazing — he built it by helping me become capable. He’d find something I struggled with and say, ‘Let’s fix that.’ When I mastered it, that became confidence. He never praised me for what I might be — he helped me prove what I could be.”
The Gift of Accountability – Leland Vittert
“People talk a lot today about giving kids grace. My dad did give me grace — but he also gave me accountability. If I didn’t do something well, he wouldn’t sugarcoat it. He didn’t shame me, but he didn’t pretend it was okay either. He’d say, ‘Alright, so that didn’t work. Now let’s figure out how to do it better.’ That’s grace with a backbone.”
Fathers Play a Critical Role – Dr. Robyn
“We don’t talk enough about the influence a father—or father figure—can have on a child’s resilience. In your story, your dad wasn’t just present, he was invested. And that presence wasn’t passive, it was intentional. For parents listening, this is such a powerful reminder that even one adult’s belief and consistency can change a child’s life story.”
A Parent’s Sacrifice Is Often Invisible – Leland Vittert
“My dad looked so strong to me growing up — like nothing bothered him. I had no idea, until I was much older, that he was going downstairs every night and crying. He took all the pain I unloaded onto him and buried it so I could rest. That is love — not just in words, but in silent sacrifice.”
Success Isn’t Luck — It’s Preparation – Leland Vittert
“I named the book Born Lucky, but luck only gets you so far. I was lucky to survive birth. I was lucky to have a dad who believed in me. But everything after that? That was work. That was discipline. That was refusing to let the first chapter dictate the ending.”
The Power of One Person Who Won’t Give Up – Leland Vittert
“There are a lot of kids who feel like the world has written them off. They don’t fit the mold. They get labeled early and then treated according to that label. What I learned is that you don’t need everyone to believe in you — you just need one person who refuses to give up on you. For me, that was my dad. His belief became my backbone.”
Don’t Wait for Motivation — Build It – Leland Vittert
“I wasn’t naturally motivated. I wasn’t bouncing out of bed saying, ‘Let me conquer the world today.’ My dad didn’t wait for motivation — he created structure that made motivation inevitable. He made sure there was always a next step, always a goal, always a standard. Motivation came from momentum.”
Preparation Creates Freedom – Leland Vittert
“My dad used to say, ‘You want freedom? Earn it.’ He didn’t give me independence because I wanted it — he gave it to me because I’d proven I could handle it. He’d say, ‘If you can show discipline when it’s hard, I will trust you when I’m not looking.’ That’s how true confidence is built — not by removing hard things, but by mastering them.”
Pain Can Become Purpose – Leland Vittert
“There were years when I felt like everything was unfair — that I was the kid who didn’t fit, who didn’t get it, who didn’t belong. Looking back, that pain wasn’t just something I survived — it became fuel. It made me empathetic. It made me persistent. It made me care deeply about people who are underestimated. Pain, when guided, can become purpose.”
Children Don’t Need Perfect Parents — They Need Present Ones – Dr. Robyn
“You don’t have to have all the answers or the perfect strategy to raise a child with resilience. What matters is being consistent, being present, and being willing to stand beside them in the hard moments. You can’t always remove the challenge — but you can refuse to let them face it alone.”
Hope Is a Strategy – Leland Vittert
“When things felt darkest, hope was the only strategy we had. My parents hoped I would figure it out. I hoped I’d one day belong somewhere. Hope wasn’t blind — it was active. It was showing up, even when progress was slow. Hope, followed by effort, is what changed everything.”

Notable Quotables:

“The world isn’t going to bend to make things easier for you — so you learn to adapt to the world.” – Leland Vittert
“You don’t need everyone to believe in you — you just need one person who refuses to give up on you.” – Leland Vittert
“My dad didn’t build my confidence by telling me I was amazing. He built it by helping me become capable.” – Leland Vittert
“Hope isn’t passive. Hope is a strategy — but it has to be followed by effort.” – Leland Vittert
“Parents don’t need to be perfect — they just need to be present.” – Dr. Robyn Silverman
“The world is full of talented quitters. Be the one who stays in the fight.” – Leland Vittert
“You can’t wait for motivation to show up — you build momentum and let motivation catch up to you.” – Leland Vittert
“Pain doesn’t just have to be something you survive — it can become purpose.” – Leland Vittert
“Children may push you away with their words, but often they’re testing to see if you’ll stay.” – Dr. Robyn Silverman
“Grace is important — but grace with accountability builds strong adults.” – Leland Vittert
“My father didn’t protect me from adversity. He walked me through it.” – Leland Vittert
“Labels can limit you — unless someone teaches you how to rise above them.” – Leland Vittert
“The standard was the standard. There was no ‘because of autism, I can’t.’” – Leland Vittert
“You earn freedom by proving you can handle it.” – Leland Vittert
“Sometimes the greatest gift a parent can give is refusing to lower the bar.” – Leland Vittert
“Confidence doesn’t come from being told you’re special — it comes from becoming capable through effort.” – Leland Vittert
“A child’s life can change because one adult decided to stay steady when things were hard.” – Dr. Robyn Silverman
“I was born lucky, but luck alone doesn’t get you very far. Discipline does.” – Leland Vittert
“We don’t have to rescue our kids from every challenge — we just have to refuse to let them face it alone.” – Dr. Robyn Silverman
“Life isn’t fair. That doesn’t give you permission to quit.” – Leland Vittert