Are you part of the fat-talkin’ club? 7 Tips to Address the Problem with Friends

Are you a member of the Fat-Talkin’ Club?  There are chapters…worldwide.

blog_girlstalk-300x199It’s Fat Talk Free Week and, like every year, we are being challenged to drop the fat talk between friends.  This can be a tall order for many.  Why? Because fat-talking has become a habit and a bona fide, integrated component of many friendship circles.  Is it part of yours?

Let’s see.

Do you hear things like:

“You’re so skinny!

“I wish I had your legs!”

“I’m such a whale…pig…heifer…elephant…”

“I can’t believe I ate that.”

“I’m so fat…”

when you are with one or more of your friends?  Then you may be a card-carrying member of the Fat Talkin’ Club.

blog_girlstalk2-300x199So what can you do about it?

  1. Bring it up: This is the time to be assertive.  If you feel awkward, blame it on Fat Talk Free week.  You are welcome to blame it on me too! Discuss what you see happening and how it can be detrimental to the people you care about most.
  2. Challenge yourselves: Can you stop the fat talk for the week?  It would be even better if you could stop it for a consistent 21 days, as it has been stated that it takes 21 days to make a habit.  It may be the beginning of the end of your Fat Talkin’ Club.
  3. Redefine your interactions: What do you want out of your friendships? What do your friends want from them?  Take the time to discuss what is beneficial and damaging in a friendship so that everyone is on the same page.
  4. Create a Fat-Talk Free Zone: (I talk about this in my body image book, Good Girls Don’t Get Fat if you would like more detail) When you and your friends are together, make it a point to steer clear of fat talk. When someone breaks that rule, call them on it and refocus so you don’t all slide back into old habits.
  5. Break free of toxic friends: Not all friends are keepers.  It’s the truth.  If a friend makes you feel inferior, unworthy, critical, or ashamed, it’s time to speak up and change the dynamic or part ways.  Surround yourself with people who embrace who you are and bring out the best in you when you are with them.
  6. Spread the word: When new people come into your life, don’t be afraid to talk about your commitment to ending fat talk in your life.  You will likely find some great people who are excited to embark on the healthy relationship you bring up!
  7. Clear your own head: When you are in the privacy of your own head, are you still fat talking?  Breaking free of this negative pattern needs to happen when we are by ourselves just as much as it needs to happen in our friendship circles.  Catch yourself when you are doing it and counter act these thoughts with positive ones about yourself.  You can always call a friend for an encouraging word.

It’s time to make a change.  Make the commitment. End fat talk.  You can do it AND you are AMAZING!

Remember…

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